Tell a Joke!, tell us a joke to make the day go faster

edit your jokes in this forum.

make us laugh.give us something to think about.it all goes here.

"One day, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead were all driving in a car when the car crashed. Minutes later they appeared up in heaven.

God says to them "Ahead are 100 stairs, at each stair you will be told a joke, if you laugh you will take the one way train to Hell, if you remain silent, you will continue on. If you make it to the top, you will stay in Heaven."

So the brunette started up the stairs. At the 55th stair she laughed, and was sent abroad the train to hell.

The redhead started to climb but laughed at the 79th stair and got on the train to Hell.

The blonde started up and made it to the 100th stair. She paused, then began laughing non stop. Shocked, God asked her why she had laughed. Still laughing she replied, "I finally got the first joke!" "

lol pure brilliance ivo!

9/10 rating 4 it

heres some ur mama jokes:

u mama's so fat she can't even jump to a conclusion
ur mama's so fat she has smaller fat women orbiting around her
ur mama's so fat i swrved my car to miss her......and ran out of petrol

note:if i have hurt anyone by these jokes plz accept my apologiz.

how do u no if a woman been 2 a boring party




her lipstick is the same way it was before she left rofl rofl :D :D :lol: :lol:

You've probably heard this before but:

A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and stops to entertain at a bar in a small town.

He's going through his usual run of stupid blonde jokes, when a large, blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and says, "I've heard just about enough of your denigrating blond jokes! What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does a person's physical attributes have to do with their worth as a human being?" The ventriloquist looks on in amazement.

"It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in my community," she continued,
"and of reaching my full potential as a person because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against not only blondes but women at large... all in the name of humor."

Flustered, the ventriloquist begins to apologize. The blonde interjects, "You stay out of this, mister, I'm talking to that little bastard on your knee!"

why hasent he rated mine yet


????? :unsure: :unsure: :unsure:










no really why :blink:

This post has been edited by gaylord on Sep 22 2005, 08:07 PM

lol v g pickle and ivo.

pickle u get 6/10.
ivo u get 5/10

i didn't really get that one ivo and i never heard it.
picle ur one i heard before i think

A ventriliquest is throwing his vioce to make it look like the dummy's telling blonde jokes, right? A blonde says she's offended and SHE THINKS THAT THE DUMMY IS REAL. As in stupid blonde.

ok that one wasn't that funny....

Ok, here's one:

Once a blonde went to the library to get a book. A few days later, she returns and says to librarian at the counter, "This book was very boring. It had too many characters and too many numbers, so i would like to return it."

The librarian says to the other librarian, "So here is the person who took our phone book!"


Another one?

" You so ugly that when you entered an ugly competition they said "NO PROFESSIONALS!!" "

finally ur back!!!lol

who hacked u to put that bad ventriliquist joke on lol!!

anyway heres 3:

1)ur mama so fat i swerved my car to miss her.....and ran out of petrol
2)ur mama so fat she can't even jump to a conclusion
3)ur mama's so fat she has smaller fat women orbiting aroung her

note:i meant no offence to ur mama.just humour.

^Thanks. And those were the first ones you told . . .

yeh ive just noticed that....whoops i know those ones too well....
ok then here:

kermit the frog goes into a bank.he goes up to the desk and the person who is surving him is called padywhack.kermit says:id like to take out a loan. padywhack says: ok first i'll need to know u'r name and u'r dad's.
kermit says,"ok my name is kermit mcjagger and my father is mcjagger from the rolling stones". padywhack:"ok how much money do u want"? kermit writes the amount on a card and padywhack says: oh ok just wait i'll consult my manager about if im allowed to give u this much. the manager (whos name is knicknackk)tells her:

it mr nicknack,padywhack,give the frog a loan, his old da's a rolling stone.

ok sing that last part in the give the dog a bone rythem.

anyway i heard that one when i was really small i'm surprised i remembered..

Very good. 8/10

How about this one?


A ham sandwich walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a cold one.

The bartender replies, "Sorry, we don't serve food here."

u 2 r hoggin the intire thread :angry:

edit by admin:.....yes i can edit ur posts...anyway i just like to say that ivo and cold dog are not hogging this topic...we are just most active in it....if gaylord here wants to post a joke in it then post the joke....if u write one more post about nothing but ur selfishness another amount of posts will suddenly disappear....

edit by gaylord:nnnnnnnnnnnnnoooooooooooo get out of my head (homerskull))