I Hate My Job!

Sorry - I needed a place to vent and here seemed logical.

Here's the scoop on my job -

I started here in August of 1999. It is a small office and basically we are sales agents for textile manufacturers around the world. My boss, who owns the company and the building our office is in is a 69 year old Israeli man, who seems to lack common sense.

When I first started here I was hired as a Secretary. There was my boss, his wife, an Office Manager and a part-time bookkeeper. I had been a secretary for about 10 years at that point, starting while I was in high school. Well here was definitely different! I had to do transcription from a tape - with a man with an Israeli accent!!!! He would do a tape all day, give it to me at 4 and expect me to have it all done by 5:00 so that we could then fax them out. Anyway, I digress.

Within a month of my being here, the boss' wife (who is very sweet) stopped coming to the office because she really didn't get along with the office manager and bookkeeper. Along with her went the lunches they would get us and the fridge being stocked with Diet Coke!!

In October of that year the Office Manager quit. The bookkeeper (who was a 65+ year old man) agreed to go full time. Now it was just me and him. It stayed that way for over a year but as things increased we tried to hire another "office worker" well let me just say that we have gone through 12 or 13 "office workers" in the past 6 years. Gee...guess everyone has issues with my boss!

In my first two years I was well compensated for my job - with regular raises - the last one coming after I took on all of the order invoicing and warehousing that an outside source used to handle.

In November of 2002, while I was pregnant, the bookkeeper decides he wants to go back to part-time. He and the boss start really not getting along. In February of 2003, he decides to leave all together - after our computers are totally wiped out by a virus. I am now 6 months pregnant and it is decided I will take over all of the bookkeeping - as well as the order processing, warehousing, phones etc.

I was now trying to deal with being pregnant, learning new things and re-establishing an accounting system that was destroyed by a virus and handled poorly as we soon came to find out.

Despite the fact that I was pre-eclamptic and had bi-weekly doctors visits, I was in work every day, until I went for a visit and a month before my due date they decided to induce me. I had my baby on a Monday night and on Tuesday afternoon, my boss so kindly brought me his laptop so that payroll (at that time his son had an office in New York and we did all of their accounting) could be done. Here I was a day after a C-section in the hospital where I should be enjoying my baby and I was doing payroll.

I was home for 4 weeks only I wasn't exactly on "leave". My boss brought me work every other day. My computer was set up to remotely work with our system at the office. I was struggling to deal with healing from a C-section, having a new baby and oh yeah my mom went to have hernia surgery exactly a month after Mia was born and ended up being in and out of the hospital for the next 2 months and then in straight from August 1 until the end of October.

Mia came to work with me every day. You see my boss didn't see fit to give me another raise after I became bookkeeper and there was just no way we could afford daycare. The plan to have my mom watch her was out the door. I still didnt' take any time off. I would come in every morning, my lunch consisted of the times I needed to feed Mia and after work we would go to the hospital to visit my mom.

You would think the man would be greatful. Yeah right.

So for the past 4 years I've been making the same pay, constantly taking on more and more responsibility.

Lately I just can't take it anymore. Perhaps it is the fact that we still pay his son $100,000 a year to do absolutely nothing!! He supposedly sells sweaters - hmmm I haven't seen any sales come in. And HE is now on a 3 month PATERNITY leave because his wife had their 2nd child. Oh did I mention that he, his wife, the nanny for the 3 year old as well as my boss and his wife - all have to be there to "help"?
I think that is the real root of my frustration. I can't afford to have a 2nd child because I would have to be back here within a few weeks and this moron gets 3 months!

Also, to give you an idea of what kind of idiot my boss is - last year we discovered Mia had a tumor on her skull. At her 2 year check up a lump I had noticed early had gotten bigger and the Doctor had us go for x-rays which led to going to a pediatric neurosurgeon. Her surgery was scheduled for a Thursday in August and while we were pretty sure that the tumor had not encroached on the bone - we still had no idea what we were dealing with. I told my boss all the info - kept him informed. The day before her surgery he had the nerve to say to me - Well you really don't need to be out of the office on Friday do you? Her surgery is Thursday. OK for all the mothers reading this you can imagine my reaction. For those who aren't - let me just say it wasn't pretty.

This is the selfish man I work for.

In 6 years I can easily count the vacations I've taken - 2! One was 6 days when I got married and the other was 5 days in 2002. I've taken days off here and there - mainly for doctors appointments etc. Last year I took 3 days off that weren't for surgeries, funerals etc.

OK I've vented. I'm feeling a bit better. My job does at times have its advantages. I'm just sick and tired of being taken advantage of and yet I'm afraid to leave. This whole situation just reminds me of my first marriage sometimes!

I just responded to a similar post on an aol message board that I post on. So I am adding the post that I did in response to her message. Some of it may apply to you or just might give you some ideas of how to get out of this toxic situation. Have you tried sitting down with your boss and taking it out. Some times it works and some times it doesn't but he may not even realize your situation and may think that you are perfectly happy with things. Maybe there are times that you should say no. Saying yes all the time and continually taking on more work without adjustments to compensation and your own time eventually will/has turned you into a door mat. Any how here is the response that I sent to Annie, my aol friend.


A toxic work enviroment can cause more physical and emotional problems than we can believe. Getting out of that enviroment was the best thing I ever did. We have our little snits and annoyances but nothing like what it was when I worked at the cathedral. Two days after I officially retired, I signed up with the temp agency that I am still with. I have the best of both worlds. The freedom of a temp and the structure of a full time job. I will be there 7 years in March and hope to make it an even 10 before I leave. IMO temping is a great way to either work after retirement like I am or to look for a new job. You try the job on before you make a commitment. If after 2 weeks a month or whatever, you know that this isn't for you then you can move on. If you like it and this is a position that seems to have possibilites. It could turn into something perm.

Well Heather, that answers the question on if you want my permanent placement contact at Associates of Westport. I called but they moved and the phone is disconnected so I'll get the info to you by Friday.

I loved temping and would have continued if the job I have now did not come through. If I decide to leave I would go back to temping. I was with Office Team which is a Robert Hall company all around the world and they were excellent.

loved temping and would have continued if the job I have now did not come through. If I decide to leave I would go back to temping. I was with Office Team which is a Robert Hall company all around the world and they were excellent.


There are several excellent temp agencies out there. The thing is to look and choose -- see what is in your area and what they offer. Some of them have medical insurance, vacation time, paid holidays depending on your work schedule. The agency that I am with is Adecco -- they too are a world wide organization. The thing is to sign up with a couple of agencies. That way you aren't sitting and waiting for one to call. Different agencies lean toward different types of placements and many are temp to perm. When I signed up 8 years ago I went with a different agency that was locally owned, had an interview, did the testing, and walked out with an assignment starting the next day. A year later I was assigned to the position that I have now. About 5 years ago the agency that I was originally with was bought out by big national agency. Things went down hill and both clients and employees were unhappy. My supervisor at work called me in and explained that they were breaking off relations with the agency and that she had talked to the counselor at the agency regarding me. They agreed that if I wanted to stay with the agency, I could leave the assignement but if I wanted to stay on the assignment, I could switch agencies with no problems. I chose to keep the assignment and signed on with Adecco, a move that I am happy that I made.

I think it is important to realize that there are other options out there! That first step is a scary one, but you have to say "what is the worst that can happen?" - can things really get worse than what you have now?? or better yet, say "what is the BEST that can happen?" - you could find a job where you are appreciated for who you are and what you can do, and have a happier, healthier life because of it.

Women are such nurturers it can be hard for us to say "enough is enough" when asked to do more for the 'good of the company' or because 'no one else can do it but you'. But that makes it easier to take advantage of us.

Stay strong, Heather! You're worth so much more than this nonsense!

can i add how much i hate my job???

My boss treats me like I'm his admin - i have no problems doing that and i have the utmost respect for those who have to do that daunting task on a daily basis

however I feel i am wasting my skills and my education doing that - yeah you guessed it i am the only female so all that stuff falls in my lap
find me a new person
plan the anniversary party
plan the lunch
we need some team building ideas
type this stuff for me
where is my stuff
and on and on...

and of course on top of all that i have my own stuff to do..
I am trying to get my green belt (another one of corporate america's mandates0
so i have been studying and taking courses and working as well

so i am tired and frustrated because whne i get home from these sometime 10-12 days I have do take care of my own family and all the stuff going on with Dad..
so i am pretty much burned out ..
Easter weekend i pretty much had had it - turned off the cell (did i mention i'm on cal 24/ as well?)
and turned off the home phone and took a long nap and took care of myself

and you know what i did the same today...

and i applied for a transfer yeterday - keep your fingers crossed - look like i have three offers to move to another group...

only one rather tall and fat problem - my boss has to ok the transfer...

we'll see

i could use some major ninja help right now....

Good for you Marie!!!! (btw, nice to see ya posting)

There are times in our lives we just have to put ourselves first to keep sane!!

for your job transfer!!

welcome back, Marie!

mobilizing the ninja squad to make sure that tall and fat problem knows what's good for him. Good for you for taking that step to make a change and make things better! Proud of you, girl!

We missed you Marie...glad you are back!

You made the first step by asking for a transfer. I did that in my previous job and the V.P. did not want me to go but I compained to HR and I think they thought I would take legal action so they let me go.......but they made me wait 2 1/2 months before I could make the move. It's awful because it's the same company and I was going to a department that really needed me???? Weird how some bosses think.

Here's a few more aimed at the boss.

Good Luck with your job transfers!! Take care

Welcome back Marie!! We missed you!!

I'm sending some more to ensure that the big jerk knows what is good for him!!

You're an inspiration! Knowing when to say when is so important!